I’d like to think that I have meaningful moments -or future memories- with my children all the time. But a lot of times life gets in the way. Sometimes you feel like you’re barely scraping by and trying to survive. Sorting through all the chaos can be really challenging to make it feel like you are being very intentional with your time with your kids.
The best way that I find to make lasting memories with my kids is to be on a routine. Every day. I take the time that I spend after I get off work, get home with my kids, I try to use that time to really invest in them.
First, We make sure that we eat dinner together. Then, we make sure that we play together. After dinner, we clean up, we read books, and we get ready for bed. Some people think that these will not be lasting memories, but these are the routines that spark who my kids will be when they’re older. The memories I pray they relive with their own families.
I know that there are a lot of different ways to make memories with your children whether you’re going to an event or you are just spending time together, these memories will stay with your children for a lifetime.
I must pause here to say that I wrote this post a month or so before finalizing it. Upon finalizing, a lot of crazy things began happening in the world (a major health Pandemic hitting the US in March 2020). This post means so much more now that many are being forced to stay home with their children, homeschool, miss outings and events.
I hope if you are reading this at the time of the Pandemic that you are well and that you will remember these moments WILL be forever memories for your children. And if you are reading it after we have moved on from the crisis, then I hope you were able to be reminded to slow down and take time to create long-lasting memories.
1 Take Pictures
We’ve all heard the saying “A picture is worth a thousand words,” but a picture is also worth a thousand memories. I challenge you to not just take pictures, but you should be IN the pictures too. I know it’s hard to remember to be in the picture sometimes. I’ve been trying to be more intentional with pictures because the pictures will transcend time; they spark memories.
Not everyone has time to make a memory book for their kids with pictures of what’s happened throughout the year. But there are lots of apps and other materials that you can use to put together a book in an easy way.
Shutterfly, snap fish, google photos, and many more sites will help you turn your photos into photo books.
Putting together the memories from the photos are a wonderful way to give your child something that will last for a very long time.
If you want to go old school, put together a memory scrapbook with and/or for your child.
2 Read together
Another thing that I like to do is read books with my kids. We’ve read together a lot and I want them to think of education as being a family thing. We read the Bible together, and we read other Bible stories but also, as a family we read other books. We have so many books at home that we could have our own little library.
Here are some of our favorite books:
3 Plan some together time
Try not to go out to the movies or go to places where your kid is going to be doing things on their own. (I know what a joke if you are reading this in March of 2020 when it is published. You can’t go anywhere anyway). By doing things as a family, what I call “together time” you will get to know each other better and learn from each other more.
Plan out your events for the whole year. If you want, start with planning one event per month. And it doesn’t have to be expensive. I’m not about spending tons of money. You don’t have to go to all the museums and go to all the play places and Disney World. You can have plenty of fun in your own neighborhood. Just schedule some intentional days to really have family time. You can do these monthly, you can do them weekly if you have the time. Setting aside time and scheduling it will make it more likely to happen.
My favorite planners are these:
- This goal planner by Christy Wright. She is all about women in business and setting personal and business goals.
- Be organized with this momAgenda I love the momAgenda, I use it daily to keep me organized and on track with my kid’s lives and my own, I wrote my goals in the front of the agenda so I can refer to it often
And if you need more on planning and goal setting, check out my post here.
As my kids get older, I can’t wait to start family game nights. They’re not quite ready for game nights because they’re only five and two, but we do play games together since they’re starting to understand.
My husband and I love to play games or puzzles. It has been so much fun incorporating them into these game nights. Even if we must play a silly game or do a smaller puzzle.
A lot of families do family movie night. Not one of my most favorites, because you’re not really interacting, but it is a fun time to snuggle, eat some popcorn and hang out and really keeps you from doing things individually and just being together.
Repetition is key to making a memory with the kids. They will begin to anticipate another game night or movie night and that excitement is awesome to watch.
4 Put the phone away
All right, so my next tip is to put the phone away. Yes, I know I told you to take pictures earlier, but really your phone should be used for pictures only. And, at that you may just invest in a camera so that you don’t have to feel the distraction of your phone. I’m afraid that we live in a society addicted to our phones. When you go to restaurants and you see families where the kids and the parents are on the phones and they don’t know how to have a conversation with each other, it’s scary.
I want to raise my kids to look people in the eye and enjoy another person’s company.
We don’t have distractions at the dinner table. We don’t listen to music. We don’t watch TV; we don’t have phones. So, I hope that one day they will understand that eating together, breaking bread together, is a family thing. It’s about talking about your day and really living life to the fullest.
My kids will probably think that I’m the cheesiest mother in the world, but I’m okay with that. Because I want to provide for them something that I never really had as a kid, and that was knowing and expecting dinner at the same time every night. I want them to enjoy being together and knowing that food means being together and having positive connotations around food.
5 Start Traditions
One great thing about making memories is traditions. We’ve talked about repetition of events, whether it’s weekly, daily, monthly, or yearly, but traditions when it comes to holidays can be even more fun.
Traditions can be something as simple as reading a story together on Christmas Eve, or baking cookies for Valentine’s Day and handing them out to people. These can be some of the most fun together activities that you can do.
Some people love to go outside and look at lights at Christmas time and drink hot cocoa. I would love to start that tradition with my family. Then, every time they see Christmas lights when they’re older, I would hope that they would think of the times when we walked together, and we drank our hot cocoa and they’ll feel nice and warm and fuzzy inside.
6 Try Special Memories
Vacations are something that not every family can afford. I totally understand that.
But a vacation in and of its definition is “a period of suspension of work, study, or other activity, usually used for rest, recreation, or travel; recess or holiday:” from dictionary.com. Let’s think about that for a minute… it’s simply a get away from your normal pace. So, whether it’s a staycation or you just save up enough money so you can go stay in a hotel somewhere nearby to the extravagant ones, vacation can be something that your kids feel is out of the ordinary. This is the opposite of what I was talking about with the repetition. Vacations are not always typical; they should be something out of the box out of the ordinary. But your kids will think of those as special moments.
I hope you will begin planning some time to be with your kids and really focus on them. Focus on the memories that you will create with them. Saying all of this, please give yourself some grace and don’t think you have to make every moment special. Love and respect go a long way. Even when you are doing the ordinary, you are creating lasting memories for your kids. If you mess up (like I do so often), it’s ok. Forgiveness is another thing that should be taught and practiced in your family.
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